a story worth remembering\\we skip the goodbyes *sometimes its hard to express in words*

dear readers, i really need some advice now. So please read this post and tag on my tagboard!! school work is driving me mad and i haven start revising for my coming block test next week. Today i was supposed to study for chem test that is on tomorrow but i ended up spending the whole day stoning and doing only the TJ compre passage. Was packing my bag just now when i found my music exam regristration form that i am supposed to hand up next week. I was comtemplating whether to register for the exam that is in june. The fees is around 200 bucks and i need to say i am not fully prepared physically and mentally for it. Should i sign it?? (1st question) if i sign the form, i was put in more work on my music practices and that means less time for study :/ my studies are atrocious now and i am like failing most of my class test this year. I already wasted my mum's money for learning the grade for a year already and if i say i want to give up now, i would be disappointing her. Wouldn't i? (2nd question) I am feeling really stress now, maybe even feel like giving up on everything in the world. Sometimes i really wish i could just sleep and never wake up; how good would that be? How can i study for blocks when i am not even in the condition. At least give me something to study!! i understand for maths i can do the revision paper to revise, for econs and GP, i can read up more. What about for the sciences?? especially physics when i have such a lousy teacher who doesn't even want to come back during the holidays for extra lessons!! no worksheets and really NOTHING!! i can say that i don understand anything that is taught this year. HOW?? (3rd question) for chem, although there is revision worksheet to do, i don understand all the parts on organic chem! irritating benzene rings, halogens, alkanes, alkenes, arenes, alcohols!! HATE YOU ALL!! i am really feeling damn stressed now!! pls, pls give me some advice.

-a troubled boy